Very funny jokes. Plz leave a star and comment if you liked it.?
Okay there are three men outside. One was a drunk, another was a greedy penny pincher, and the last one was gay.
A truck came and ran them all over.
When they awoke, they found themselves in heavan. And god was right there when they woke up. He told them:
god: "I will send you three men back down to Earth if you all promise me one thing."
The three men agreed.
God speaking to the first man: "you can never drink beer again"
God speaking to the second man: "you can never pick money off the ground."
God speaking to the third man: "you can never have anal sex."
The men agreed. so god sent them back down to earth.
To celebrate there arival back on earth, they All went out for a drink.
POOF the first guy disappears. After that the two guys that were left went waking down the road. Then the second guy spots a penny! He says to himself, No i will not pick this penny up for it will cost me my life.
So they keep walking. and on the ground is a dollar. He says to himself, "I really want this dollar, but it is not worth it." So they keep walking.
Then the man see's a Five Dollar bill on the ground. He couldn't help it so he bent over to pick it up and POOF both guys disappear.
:]
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There is this boy who one day goes up to his dad while they were in the garage. the boy says "Hey dad i finally had Sex!"
Dad: "Thats good for You!" and he pulls out a couple of beers to celebrate. "Now do you have any questions?"
Boy: "yeah, when will my butt stop hurting?"
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A beautiful teacher was having trouble with one of her students in 1st Grade class.
She asked,"Boy. What is your problem?"
Boy answered,
"I'm too smart for the first-grade.
My sister is in the third-grade
And I'm smarter than she is!
I think I should be in the 4th Grade!"
Madam had enough.
She took the boy to the Principal's office.
While the boy waited in the outer office,
Madam explained to the principal what the situation was.
The principal told Madam he would give the boy a test.
And If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade And Behave.
She agreed.
The boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he
agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Boy.: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Boy.: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal thought a 4th grade should know.
The principal looks at Madam and tells her,
"I think this Boy can go to the 4th grade."
Madam says to the principal,
"I have some of my own questions.
Can I ask him?"
The principal and the boy both agreed.
Madam asks,
"What does a cow have four of that I have only two of"?
Boy, after a moment,
* "Legs."*
Madam:
"What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
Boy.:
* "Pockets." *
Madam:
What starts with a C and ends with a T,
Is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy.:
* Coconut ; *
Madam:
What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?
The Principal's eyes open really wide
And Before he could stop the answer,
The boy was taking charge.
Boy.:
* Bubble-gum. *
Madam:
What does a man do standing up, A woman does sitting down
And A dog does on three legs?
The Principal's eyes open really wide
And
Before, he could stop the answer...
Boy.:
* Shake hands. *
Madam:
A finger goes in me.
You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first.
Boy.:
* Wedding Ring. *
Madam:
I come in many sizes.
When I'm not well, I drip.
When you blow me, You feel good.
Boy.:
* Nose. *
Madam:
I have a stiff shaft.
My tip penetrates.
I come with a quiver..
Boy.:
* Arrow. *
Madam:
What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K'
That means lot of heat and excitement?
Boy.:
* Fire-truck. *
Madam:
What four-letter word that starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K'
& If you don't get it, You have to use your hand.
Boy.:
* Fork. *
Madam:
What is it that all men have one of, it's longer on some men than on others,
The Pope doesn't use his, And A man gives it to his wife after they're married?
Boy.:
* SURNAME. *
Madam:
What part of the man has no bone But has muscles,
Has lots of veins, Like pumping,
& Is responsible for making love ?
Boy.:
* HEART. *
The principal breathed a sigh of relief
And Said to the teacher,
"Send this Boy to grade 5, * *
I got the last ten questions wrong myself!".*
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>>>A blonde is watching the news with her husband.
>>>The news man says 2 Brazilian men die skydiving.
>>>She cries and says "That's terrible! So many men dying like that!"
>>>Her husband confused says "Yes, but skydiving is dangerous."
>>>Still sobbing, she says "How many is a brazilian?"
hope you enjoyed, plz leave commen
Tagged with: beers • butt • dad • down to earth • first grade • first man • five dollar bill • god • heavan • madam • Money • penny pincher • poof • second man • third grade • third man • three men • two guys
Filed under: Info
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i lol’d.
especially @ "How many is a brazilian?"
AHAHAHAHAA
Very good, thanks for the laughs
lame jokes, at best
hahah long but amazing
LOL they were great thanx
lol, good ones!
HAHAHA!!!
haha i liked the last one.
I loved the last two. They were great. lol Very nice. ^.^
Haha, the first and the last was the best!!!
lmao. They’re all freaking hilarious.
Those are pretty funny i like the sky diving one ; ]